Welfare candidate William Jennings has been revealed to be little more than a hand-operated puppet, to the shock and consternation of many voters.
The appalling truth was revealed earlier today when Jennings, giving a spirited class address, fell off the hand of that controls him. The hand in question belongs to infamous prankster and hand puppeteer, Giovanni Picini.
Said Picini: "It was only meant to be something of a laugh. I never meant it to go this far. When I registered him as a student, I thought I'd be found out pretty quickly but here we are four years later."
Surprisingly, the news that Jennings is in fact a puppet has boosted his popularity with UL's notorious swing voters and given Jennings a three point lead in the polls. Following this unprecedented result, presidential candidate Adam Moursy has revealed that he, too, is a puppet but he would not disclose who is pulling his strings.
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